Sunday, December 26, 2010

Happy New Year

This was our sweet little babies very first Christmas with their new family. We were so very blessed this year to get to have them as part of our family. Last year we missed Christmas with them by a week. They were so excited to open their presents and watch all the other kids open theirs. In all I have to say it was the best Christmas I have had.
The cleaning up after 10 kids took awhile, but all worth it. Now we are getting ready for the new year, Since it will be our last here in San Antonio. It be bitter sweet to hang out with our friends. Our house had been looked at 12 times now, but still no buyers. We still have Tony's work that will buy it on March 2ND if we do not sell it first.
As far as Dallas, we have seen a few we like, but not enough to buy yet. We are a family that is hard to please when it comes to a perfect home. We have to have at least 5 bedrooms, at least 3,500 sq.ft, and we really want a pool. I guess we are a little picky, but it's just what we want!!
My little Emma is having a lot of tummy pain the past 6 months, so tomorrow morning she will under-go an endoscopy. We are praying that they tell us what is wrong with her.
So, I'm going to go and prepare her for bed since we have an early morning. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas, and have a great New Year!!

Monday, December 20, 2010

Loving the Holidays

I'm not sure if I had ever mentioned before that my husband Tony was adopted when he was 10 days old. The entire time I have known Tony he has always talked a little bit about his biological parents and who they were, and where they were. This year Tony, and I finally set out to find them.
Well, we did it!!! After looking for almost a year, we found them. They were shocked at first and a bit stand offish, but they came around. Now I get to sit back and watch this beautiful relationship build over very emotional emails. It has been so beautiful to me. The things his bio-parents say to him are so heartfelt. They say exactly what I believe Tony needed to hear. They were 16 and to young, but loved him so much. They talk about how they wanted to hold him and hug him so bad.
Today they sent another letter telling Tony this year they were giving their parents, (Tony's grandparents), the best Christmas gift of all, the gift of finding Tony. They will set them down and tell them that they finally found him. I thought that was so sweet and touching. Now the next step I guess is to try to meet them!! Its just exciting. I'm sure they about died when they saw we had 10 kids, but isn't everyone. They are very strong Christian people, just like Tony.
Well, that's our exciting news for now. The kids are all doing great and getting ready for the big day!!
Me and Tony have been talking a lot about adopting again, but right now we can not agree on what child, what age, and what place. Tony wants to wait until our move is over and we know where we will be. As for me there are two babies on Reece's Rainbow that I would love to adopt right now!!
Our house is still on the market and we are suppose to close on it March 2Nd. Then we will have to say goodbye t all our friends here and move away from this home, and place we have loved for so long. I will miss everyone here so dearly.
For now I will leave you with some pictures that we have taken over the past few months of our 10 wonderful kids. We feel truly blessed this year with everything that God has given to us!! On the 24Th it will be one year that we adopted our children!! What a wonderful year!!

Monday, December 6, 2010


I'm sorry for the delay in writing on here. We have been so busy in trying to see our house lately that everything is a little crazy right now. It seems like every time centralized showing calls to show our home, it is the worse time possible with dirty diapers smelling in the garbage, toys all over, and dishes in the sink. We have to run very fast and clean it all up, and put the dogs in the car and leave. Sometimes the people do not even show up, those are the times that I really have to hold in my anger!!
Other than that we are all doing OK here. My little girl Emma is having some tummy issues that are concerning us and she is about to have an upper GI next week. We are thinking that she will end up having celiac disease since her sister has had the same issues before. It is suppose to be a lifelong disease that never goes away, but Grace my 10 yr.old outgrew it. We knew though that is was God that had curred her . The doctor's just do not say that.
The babies are doing OK as well. Nessie the youngest has been screaming at us a lot. I'm not sure what this means, but it is driving us crazy. She seems to be angry at everyone and is even attacking her brother Eli. We are having to keep them apart at times. Its just one of those things we are having to learn about and how to deal with.
I hope everyone is well. I'm sorry to be so short, but Emma is having a tummy ache and I need to hold her now!! Goodnight!

Hello Again!!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Waiting For The Week To End!!

This has been a very long, yet stressful week. The nasty neighbor down the road is back on her broom stick going after us again. This time she has included her sons. They have began fighting with my son. I guess someone trashed there home on Halloween night and they called the cops telling them that we admitted to it. I would never even consider doing something like this. After that is when her sons started making fun of mine. So she told my son he could not come up on a PUBLIC street to play in front of her house anymore. My husband walked down there and told her she had no right saying that, so she called the cops again!! The cops this time told her she needed to get over it. They told her tony did nothing wrong, and that it was a public street.
I had just started thinking that I love my house and getting sad about moving, but now I remember that God has got a plan in all of this. I know God is moving us to Dallas because this will only get worse staying here. I can not stand to be here next to her anymore. We have kept our mouths silent through all of this. We have been the bigger people and have not done a thing to her, and we wont. I just need to leave.
As for my kids. Everyone is well. The kids had fun on Halloween, and they are starting to get excited now about the move. Faith, my oldest is the only one that is still heart broken to leave her best buddy. This will be a painful time for everyone watching her deal with this move.
You can see below that the babies are loving the moving boxes. They have taken a few of them for toys. I think they like them better than they do their real toys.
Tony will be going back to Dallas next week to house hunt again while I stay behind. It is just to hard looking with all of the kids.
Well the kids all have Doctor apt. today so I will be running all day. This is when it gets really fun being the mom of 10!!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Getting Ready for Thanksgiving!!

Halloween!!! Well, its not my favorite holiday at all. Actually we have tried to not have Halloween , but it just was not fair for the kids I felt. So, last night we tried to make the most of it and IT WAS HORRIBLE!! After we went trick or treating we decided to have a get together with friends down the street. They just happen to live next door to the evil neighbor that hated me. Well, during the night the nasty neighbor got mad AGAIN, and called the cops. She told them that we were loud and she thought we were disturbing the neighborhood. So, what was a great night ended up turning into a nasty night because of this lady that CAN NOT stop harassing me in every way that she can. I know though that I will be moving soon enough and never have to look back. I just feel bad for all my neighbors that will have to still deal with her.
Now, I'm looking ahead and getting ready for my last Thanksgiving here in San Antonio. I'm really hoping that my brother will be able to make it like I said before.
I'm going to leave you guys with some pictures from all of our kids last night!! Get ready there will be a lot!!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Never enough Time

It seems like time is running away from me lately. I never find enough time in one do to finish what needs to be done. I went to my doctor for anxiety this week and they put me on a new medication that is giving me the worse side effects ever. They put me on Paxil. It keeps making me really dizzy and I am soooo angry all the time. I'm not sure why. I feel like I am always angry with the kids this week so I just have to walk away. I now just stooped taking the medicine and started to take my old one. I can not believe the way one pill can make someone feel. I hated feeling that mad all the time. My life brings me so much joy, everything I do I find it so interesting to me. I really love the life that I have. So fir me to feel like this, Its just odd, and I do not like it one bit. The move adds a little stress as well. The movers are coming tomorrow to take a lot of things from our house. Then we will leave at 4.00 to go to Dallas for 3 days and house hunt. We have been praying hard for a home that will keep us near other kids , yet a lot of land. We want our children to be able to have others to play with. We are praying that this goes well for us.
For thanksgiving we will be doing it at our house this year. My mom and dad will be coming. They only live about 3 hours away, yet they have only seen my adopted kids a few times. They still do not know the names of all of my kids. It is really sad. I try not to think about it very much or talk about it because I don't want it to bother me. This past month they came to visit us and we had the best time ever. I realised that them not coming to see me all the time was my dad just never being able to really sit still. My mother sat and played with the babies for so long and loved on them. For me it was bitter sweet. I can not remember a time when my mother ever sat and really played with me as a child. I can not remember my mother of father ever telling me that they loved me. So, It was nice to see that my mother had that in her, but sad that it was never said to me. So, this year for Thanksgiving it will be really sweet because I have not spent one with MY family in about the last 5 years. I have 2 brothers that are identical twins, both of them are chiropractors that have led very , very wealthy lives. One of them still does, and the other one has fallen into a terrible place ion life right now because of drugs. He has lost everything, even his family. He will be here to. It is very nice to get to spend time with him because he was so shut off from my family for so long. Now, I am one of the only people that will really sit and talk to him. My other brother financially supports him and send s him to all the fancy rehabs. He just got back from passages in Malibu. It was about 90,000 for one month. Now he is going to another rehab, so I'm not sure if he got his money out of it.
Anyways, I have talked a lot tonight. I have just had a lot on my mind this week. I'm excited to see my family that I thought forgot about me after the adoption. We were sorda an embarrassment to them with 10 kids. I'm happy to know that they are still there for me, and that we are getting close again. I hope next time O blog that I have good news about finding a new house in Dallas!!

Friday, October 22, 2010

Moving for sure!

We found out that we are indeed moving for sure as soon as we can. Tony will be starting his new job on the first of next month. He will just do his job from here until we move. It is all getting so real now the agents are coming here to list our house and everything. We have a lot of friends that we will be leaving behind, and a new house that we have only lived in for 16 months.
Most of the kids are excited as I said before, but there is still Faith that is heart broken. We talk to her every night about it and what we can do to make it better. It just really hurts your child to see them hurting like this knowing that we are the reason why!!
I am having to give up all of my foster puppies this week because of the house being showed. We do not want all the puppies here. My husband is very happy to see them go. He has never really liked me fostering, but he has put up with it. He is very sweet to support me in whatever I do.
I am not looking forward to the phone ringing every hour with centralized showing and having to get the house clean in 20 minutes and get everyone into the car. That gets really hard to do with the new babies and the four big dogs.
I guess it is time for me to go start putting some of the clothes in some boxes, they said we need to get half of everything we have in every room out !! So fun!!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Lots on my mind

Today is a bitter sweet day here at home. Tony found out last week that we are for sure moving to Dallas. I am the type of person that loves to move so I am excited. I do however worry about all the kids. They seem to be bothered by us moving. My oldest Faith is still having such a hard time. I'm just praying that when we move she can find new friends right away and we will all adjust.
So its good news, but also bad. I have to say goodbye to the best church I think ill ever find. The people there are amazing and have helped us through a lot. They were all there to support us through the adoption, and to pray when things got tough. I just hope that Ill find the same type of church in Dallas.
This week we decided to pull Noelle out of school. When I went to her school last week and saw her in the corner crying to herself, it broke my heart. I am really worried about a lot of the things she is telling me. Sunday she awoke crying telling us that we were getting old and that we were going to die soon. That freaked us out a little. She really has this fear of death that is very concerning. Why should a 7 year old carry all this on their shoulders?
We have been looking back at the last year now that it is coming to a close and all that we have accomplished. I am satisfied, but I do feel like God has more planned for our family. We still do not know if God is calling us to adopt again, or what. I would really like to adopt again, maybe even baby or kids with HIV. I just do not know a lot about it right now. Whatever we do I am excited to know that God is not done using us yet. The kids keep asking us when we are going to have another baby, or if we are going to adopt again? I just keep telling them when God wants us to, we will.
I will leave you with a few pictures of the kids just being silly. Thanks for reading, Leah

Friday, October 15, 2010

My husband was a bit upset with my last post because of the pictures i posted. I thought that when I posted last time I had told everyone about their eye surgery that they had just had. Now I see that I forgot to mention that. I guess not I see why the pictures do not look so well. They had just had their surgery and their eyes were very blood shot. I was showing everyone that they were recovering well. They just went to the doctor again today and he said they everything is going very well for them. They will not need to re-do anymore eye surgeries. We are very happy about that.
Well, It is official, Tony got his new job and we are moving to Dallas. This is such a bitter sweet moment. Our kids are heartbroken and I'm not sure how to handle that, and we will miss our church family so much. I do know that everything will be o.k. in the end and that our kids will make new friends very fast once we get there. Faith, our oldest just made a very good friend here and it has taken her so long to make friends because she is home schooled, and because she is shy. I keep telling her we just have to get our more in Dallas and be more active.
We are also having a few issues with my middle daughter Noelle. She is one of the children that I home schooled forever. This year she wanted to try school. We let her and she like it at the start of the year. Now she cries everyday before she goes. We are staring to see that she cries all day now about school. She said that it is because she misses me and that she thinks something bad will happen to me while she is away. When I went to school yesterday to have lunch with my son I saw Noelle in the corner crying all by herself. It totally broke my heart. I went and sat with her, then took her home. Now I am pulling her out of school to home school her. We have been dealing with his for about 2 months now. There was a little boy and his mom from her class that died last week in a car wreck so I thought maybe that was why she was so upset, but she said she didn't know him and that that was not why.
I just don't understand why all of my biological kids have such bad anxiety issues. I did to as a child, but I didn't know it was really all passed down to your children. I was hoping that we were raising them right and showing them enough love that they would not be that way. Now I feel like we are doing something wrong. A lot of people have also judged me now that I am pulling her out of school saying that she will never learn to face people now. I can not just sit there thought while she tries to figure it out, there has got to be another way.
I'm hoping that when we move to Dallas I can get more involved in co-ops there and have her meet with other kids to get some social skills in.
all the kids are getting over a very nasty flu bug here. It started with the babies, and now has gone though just about every child in the home and my husband. I am the only one that did not get it. I am so thankful for that because I did not have the time to get sick this week.
I'm going to bed now because it is so late, I'm sorry for the bad pictures from before. I'm going to leave you with some pictures of my oldest daughter Faith who is 13. Please pray for her during this move because she is taken really hard because she is loosing her buddy, who is also in the picture with her. Pray that she will find new friends fast in Dallas, and that she will not be angry at us about the move!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Almost a year

The weather changing reminds me so much of getting ready to leave a year ago for the Ukraine. It was this time last year that we got our date to meet our babies. I have been reading another blog of this darling little baby named Makayla. The poor mom is having a terrible time over there right now. It brought back soooo many memories for me. I went back and re-read my blog and saw that our post were so depressing as well. I knew then that I was very negative and kept apologizing for it. The people leaving comments on this ladies blog are sooo hateful. They keep telling her she should not adopt this baby then. I feel so bad for her because this was such a hard time to begin with, then you have people like that telling you that you should not even adopt because you are depressed. It made me so angry. I missed my other kids back at home so much that it really ruined my trip. I was trapped inside a small apartment all day and could not eat any of the food there, and it snowed so much every day. It was just not the same experience so many people are having now. I wish I could have made it more positive, but what matters most is now, what happens after you get home. Its the time with your family after you adopt that is so important. Your time there is so short lived and really not that big of a deal. I'm happy now that I look back that I went and got to see where my babies came from and the country that they lived in.
I'm doing better here with the drama here with the neighbor. She is still very evil and the things she said about me still sting,but I not letting it get me down.
We are praying that Tony gets the new job in Dallas soon. If we do, we should be moving before December. We are trying to get a home out in the country so that we can have horses and a lot of farm animals. This is what we have dreamed of having for a very long time and I hope that this would be the last time that we move for a long time.
I'm going to end this now with some pictures of some of the kids just playing around. Hope you enjoy!!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Moving along

Tony and I have been thinking about moving to Dallas Texas. His job will be transferring us there. Tony has never really liked his job here because he does not feel like he is doing enough. The job he will have there will have him doing a great deal more, and things he likes to do/ Its really sad to talk to the kids about moving, but if it happens it will happen soon, like next month. I don't really know how to deal with talking the, into it, so any advise would be great. The only time we ever moved was local, just to a bigger home. In fact we have only been in our home for a year. Now that we are having issues with our neighbor moving sounds even better to me!! She Is still talking behind out backs to everyone. I'm not sure what I said in my blog post before, but this lady called cps on us saying the most horrible things about us. A lady that was once a very good friend I thought. It was very crushing to me to see how people can turn on you.
Anyways we thought along time about what to do if anything. In the end we decided to be the bigger people and do nothing. Just let it go. We have, but she has not.
The babies eyes are healing very well after having their eye surgery. They say that alot of times babies have to have the surgery twice. So far so good and we do not have to repeat it. All three of the babies do have a virus right now though. Alot of throwing up. Its sad to see our little babies all sick at the same time. Leeska is getting so smart. They are teaching her so many new things at school. She has learned very fast to feed herself. She is now working on potty training. We will see how well that works. I hear that potty training is a real struggle with kids with downs. Not sure if that is true or not, we will see.
The homeschooling is working out really well, because I am not really homeschooling myself. As I said before it is IQ Academy. They teach my kids public school, its just online. It has been very structured and very good for my girls. They had a hard time adjusting to the new ways at first, but now they are loving it. They have a teacher they talk to everyday, and they turn in their homework through a scanner every Friday. If anyone is to busy to home school, but not ready to do public school, I highly recommend this program. Its all free because it is a charter school.
Well, Time to talk to my hubby . Night time is the only time we have to sit alone and talk about our life and day. Its the most important time we have together. We make sure we have this time every night so that we never let a day go by without talking to one another about our day and about the things we have done. I don't want to ever be so busy that we loss that. I have many friends that have and I think that is what keeps a relationship strong!! Night guys!!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

God on my Side

This pass month I have been feuding with my neighbor really bad. She thinks that I said things that were never said. To make a very long story short she has a lot of hate in her. I guess to get me back she went and called CPS on me. She told them about 32 different things that were the most awful things anyone could say about anyone. I just can not understand the things that she made up. We were terrified that they would believe the things, but we knew that God was on my side. We both prayed, and had our entire bible group pray. When they walked into our home they laughed at first because I guess some of the things said were that our house was filthy and had dog poop everywhere and that I let my babies eat dog poop. So as they entered my home they looked around and smiled in relief knowing that already they were wrong. As I listened to the rest of the allegations I was in shock. How can someone have that much hatred in their bodies. I just do not get it. Now I sit here and wonder what comes next. Since that didn't work I wonder if she will try something else.
Please just pray for this woman and that she can let go of this hate that she has for me and our family and that she will leave us alone.
As far as everyone else, the kids are great. School is going great. Two of our kids are doing online public school. Its called IQ academy. They love it. Its a great program. The kids have really enjoyed it. I hope every ones week is going better than mine, but we are happy that this is over and we can move on. This all happened yesterday which was my husbands 35th birthday also. In the end it was all Good because God had our backs in the entire time!! Thank You God!!

Friday, September 10, 2010

Moving along

Well I am happy to say that everything is ok at home now. It seems lately like all I have to talk about is drama in our life. The only exciting news right now is that I am pretty sure we are moving. We have just been here for a year, and now Tony's office is moving us to Dallas Texas, not to far from where we are now. We have been busy looking for homes on the Internet. We have actually found a lot that we really like so It will not be as hard as we thought.
The neighbor thing still continues, but I have learned just to ignore her. My husband has warned me the entire time to not be friends with her and that she was danger, and I never obeyed. That is why I should listen to him, because I got the one hurt in the end. I see her everyday and she acts like she never sees me. I just do the same. Just one more good reason to move out of here.
The babies had their eye surgeries last Friday and they are doing great. Leeska might have to have her again because her eyes still cross, but we will have to wait awhile to be able to tell. Eli is doing great. He has no complications from his chocking accident. All 3 babies are getting a cold right now, and that's never good because they all get so fussy at the same time.
IM getting ready for a great weekend having out with friends, I hope all you can do the same!!

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Just a Bad week!

I have not posted in a few days because this has just got to be a very bad week. After Eli getting sick and chocking we had yet more drama. First the 2 girls had their eye surgery. Everything went well, so we are hoping now that their eyes will not cross anymore and that they can see better. We will not know anything for about a month.
Now, I don't know if I have spoken much about this baby Addison I have been watching, but I will tell you now. My neighbor has an 18 yr.old daughter that had a friend that literally dropped her baby off at my neighbors and took off for three days. I helped watch the baby to. A few days later the mom asked me to watch her again, so when I picked the baby up we sat and talked for awhile. She was telling me that she had a horrible mom and just wanted to learn to be a good mom, so I told her I would love to help her out. She agreed to take my help. I know now she was just using me. She would still leave the baby overnight. I then told her I would only babysit for her to go get a job, not go out. She called me yesterday and asked me once again to watch her. I told the mom I was going to Austin overnight and she agreed to let me watch the baby overnight in Austin. While I was there I had to come back to San Antonio to get medication for my babies. I sent her a text to tell her then came home. While I was at home my neighbors 18 yr old saw me at home and called the mom and asked her where her baby was because I was at home without her baby. I guess she never got my text so she calls me cussing me out telling me to get her baby back right now or she was going to call the cops. To this point I know my neighbors said something to her that was not true for her to react the way she did. They knew my brother was a doctor and I think they told the mom that my brother was going to look at the bump on her head and it freaked her out. This baby has a huge bump that she is always grabbing. Anyways, she did call the cops on me. She told them I kidnapped the baby. So now I'm freaking out. My brother called me a lawyer and he dealt with the cops. The night ended with me giving her the baby and not going to jail , but I was soooo hurt by so many people. My neighbor was a good friend of mine and I thought she would be worried about me and care about what was happening, but because I told her that this would not have happened if her daughter had not said anything to the mom she said the most hurtful things ever. She told me I was never really her friend and I was a bad mom. I was soo shocked. This is the neighbor that we have had issues with before. I guess we were not ever really good friends anyways. Its just sad because all in all I was just trying to do a good thing for someone that needed help. I'm still so hurt that she would call the cops on me. That is how our weekend was. Now I'm going to take a nap because the night was full of tears and trying to understand. A lesson was learned that I just can not trust people like I used to!

Monday, August 30, 2010

Very Scary Sunday

Yesterday, Sunday was my 35th Birthday. It was all going great until about 3.00 yesterday. I had decided to go to the grocery store with 2 of my girls and Eli. As we were driving down the road I saw Eli choking in the back. I started yelling for my oldest daughter Faith to help him. She tried to finger swipe him, but nothing would help. I then pulled into an apartment complex parking lot. As I opened the door and blocked traffic I pulled Eli to the ground and began finger swiping him to. That didn't work so I then did the Heimlich on him. He was so blue that I was just screaming. Other people came running to help as they called an ambulance. Eli finally started breathing, but he was spitting up blood and kept choking every 2 minutes. When we arrived at the hospital they did an x-ray of him very fast. They could not find anything, but knew something was there because he was not getting enough oxygen to him, he was faint and still a blueish color. Then a lot of doctors came in saying that they were taking him to the O.R. Then I just lost it. Alot of people from my church were already there holding me, comforting me. I was so scared. So many crazy thoughts went through my head. I wasn't ready to give him up yet, I would not give up without a fight. When they finally came back an hour later they showed us the ugly little piece of plastic wrapping paper they found way down in his esophagus. It was so small that it was probably the size of an eraser top. It had blocked his airway. While they were scoping him they found a lot of blood in his tummy so they would not let him go home. I was afraid, but relieved that he was OK at this moment.
Today they released Eli. They think the blood was from the plastic scratching his throat. I brought my sweet baby boy home and just loved on him. Its amazing the things that they can choke on. We came home and did a clean sweep of our entire home. Last Christmas a dear friend of my husband had a friend that had a neighbor that had a little girl about 2. She put a screw in her mouth and swallowed it. This little girl died Christmas day on the way to the hospital. Can you imagine how traumatizing??? That's all I could think of last night. You feel so bad that you didn't protect them from such small silly things. I still don't know where he got it in his car seat in the back of the car, but he did. All I know is that so many people prayed last night for my baby boy and God heard all their prayers, he is ok, and he is resting today and back to trying to bust out of his playroom. Thanks everyone for praying for my baby boy.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Lonely home

Older picture to the left!!
I don't know where to begin. This may sound crazy to some, but only having 5 kids at home feels so lonely!!! I only have the three babies, Grace my 10 year old homeschooler, and Emma my 4 yr. old home right now. The house is so calm as the babies sleep, and I'm not sure what to do.
The kids had a great first day at school, but not so much on the bus home. As I waited for my kids to get off the bus, my 2 first graders did not get off. My boys said they never even got on. I was in a panic as I drove to the school. When I got there they had no idea where they were. After waiting for about 15 minutes a bus driver called saying she had the wrong kids on her bus. We knew it was them. I was very impressed with my girls because somehow they got on the wrong bus going to our old address. When the bus driver told them to get off at our old home they told her that we no longer lived there. I was so glad that they didn't just get off and sit there. Then I found out that my older girl gave the bus driver my cell phone number. She has never even called this number, so I was amazed that she even knew it. All in all everything ended up well. The girls did just as they should have. It makes you feel good when they handle scary situation's very well!! Granted they do not want to the ride the bus again, I can handle that!!
These pictures on top are of Noelle and Haily, my first graders!! Even though I'm lonely without all my kids, its nice to have a small break at times!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

First Day Of School

Tomorrow is the first day of school, and for half of my crew it is the first day ever of school. We are all so excited. I know the kids are a bit nervous, but that is to be expected.
I have no idea what I'm going to do yet with all my time. I will still be homeschooling one of my kids so I'm going to try to make this an exciting year for her. I want to really get out there and get involved in co-ops and sports. I have not ever done this before because we had to many kids at home.
This will be a short post tonight because we are getting the kids ready for their big day. I hope everyone enjoys their big day tomorrow at their first day of school!!!!

Friday, August 20, 2010

A New Outlook

God has really been working on my heart this week in many ways with Haily. At first I was fighting him, but I have now realized this is all an answer to my prayers. I now know what I need to do to help my issues with Haily. I think I have always known, its just hard to admit, and it is very hard to do when she hurts me so much. I know I need to be the bigger one, I know I need to be the one that just starts accepting some of the smaller things that Haily does. I'm praying if I can just get passed the little things, she will stop doing them. I know this is a cry out for help on her behalf. I also know that I'm not spending enough attention with her as I should. I guess as a parent it really hurts to admit that. It hurts so see that we can mold our children into something so sad when its not at all what we meant to do. God has really opened a lot of doors this week for me and has shown me the things I need to do. I feel very grateful that I have this relationship with God and that I can see that these things he is telling me are really from him. I can see their future ahead now and what I hope will be a different Haily. A child that she should have been from the start. I'm not sure where I went wrong with her,but I have for sure fallin off the wagon with her and I am ready to make up for it now. I just Pray that we caught it in time to make a difference in her little life!!
We went this week to meet all the teachers for the kids. Haily and Noelle my middle biological daughter will be in the same class. This will be Noelle's first time ever in school. She was so afraid at first so we thought it would be better to put her with Haily. I hope this does not work against me now because Noelle can be really bossy towards Haily. In the end Noelle would have had a very hard time staring school. I can not wait for all the kids to go back to school and make new friends. This will be such a new experience for some if the kids I can not wait to see how they will do.
We are going to go buy some of the kids there school clothes this weekend. We had to wait until payday to go, and it just happens to be the tax free weekend. That is not a good thing for us. I hate crowds!!! Not to mention when we take the babies out I get very tired of all the people always starring at us trying to figure out if I had 3 babies with downs, and why we have so many kids. Yesterday at school I had 3 people give me nasty looks. Then I had one man even come up to me and ask if they were all mine. When I said yes he just shook his head in disgust and walked away. I always think to myself, why the hell do they care!!! We were not loud, we didn't get into any ones way, we did not bother anyone. I sometimes just do not get it. I think some people think I do this for money. If only they knew how much money we spent to adopt!!!! These are just things we will always deal with, it just never gets any easier!!
In the end, they are all my babies and I love the all. I do not care what the hell people think. I have a home full of so much love and always will. More love than some of these people will ever know!!!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Monday Night

I feel very bad that the only things people know of some of my children are the sad things that drive me crazy about them. Haily can be a very gentle sweet little girl. Haily has been through a lot in her short life. When she was born she was born to a crack cocaine positive mom and Haily was born positive. She also had the cord wrapped around her neck several times. She was pronounced dead when she was born , but revived. I know none of this makes what she is doing o.k., but it can explain some of the things that might make her mind not work the way it should. I struggle everyday to bond with Haily the way I should. She only acts the way she does with me, so I need to go to therapy with her to resolve these issues.
Other than that, we have had an exciting day today. I took all the kids and a few extra to the pool today. It was fun other than the babies jumping into the pool at the same time. That took a few friends having to come and hold some of the babies. My oldest Faith is such a big help to e. She is always there to help when I need her to be.
We start going to school classes tomorrow to meet teachers. I am actually getting very sad for my little Noelle who will start Public school for the first time. She has had alot of fear so we home schooled her. Now she is so excited. I am happy for her to be able to get out there and make her own friends. I'm not sure what I will do with all my time now at home. Its going to be so lonely!!
I apologise for the blogging when it seems like I am just venting. Life here at the Beasley home is really fun most of the time. The kids play so well together and we never get bored here. This is the life I have always wanted and I can not wait until we are in the position to adopt more children. Not for many years, but there will be more!!

Broken Hearts

Today it has happened again. My daughter Haily has gotten into trouble again. I do not know what to do. I am blogging just to keep away from her right not.
It started out that she was to throw away something. While she went through the kitchen I saw her pick something off the ground and eat it. I knew right away she found food on the ground, so I went up to her and told her to open her mouth. When I did she shook her head no. OK, so now I'm getting mad. I told her again to open her mouth again, she then closed her mouth so tight and looked away, so I then started to try to open her mouth just to see what she had eaten. While I was attempting to open her mouth , she bit me!!!!!! I could not believe that she actually bit me. I then really opened her mouth to see what she had eaten just to make sure she had really taken something. Of course, she did. Now had she just asked me if she could have whatever she had found, I would have given it to her and she knows that. That's what I do not understand. She gets what she wants or asks for so it does not make sense to me. I then sent her to my room and put her in time out where she will be for awhile for biting me.
This entire thing could have been avoided if she has just asked. The other reason its a big deal is because she just got out of time out or got out of being grounded. Every time we give her the freedom to just walk around she gets into everything. She cuts things up, or her hair, or she steals things, then she always always lies about everything!! I can not do this anymore!! I feel like I'm going crazy and I do not have the energy to deal with this. I'm doing something wrong and I do not know what it is. We give her her one on one time, we make her feel loved. Even today when she was in trouble I explained to her that we loved her so much and that she was hurting our feelings because she would not listen to us. I told her that mommy and daddy loved her and wanted her to not lie or steal so that she would stay out of trouble.
I'm finding a therapist today to see this week. I do not have a lot of faith in them because of past history with my middle son, but I'm praying that this works. I'm praying that someone can understand her head and what she thinks, and why she can not just listen. She has so much love and can be such a sweet little girl. Everyone loves her at first sight. They can not believe that she does the things she does when I tell them.
Please pray for our little girl and our family as we go through this trial right now. I want Haily to know that we love her and that we will always be here, but she needs to understand that she can not do the things that she is doing as well.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

The end of the Summer!!

Some of the kids are really excited to start school this year, then their are some that are really scared about it. For my oldest Faith it will be her first time in public school since she was in third grade. She is a little scared about it, but there is some excitement for her to. She has made friends in the new neighbor hood here where we just moved so she will get to be with her new buddies. Then there is Grace, the one I spoke of in my last post. She has begged us not to put her back into school, so I didn't.
My husband has his reservations about it, but gave in to me as he always does!!! He just thinks like I said before that we sometimes set her back. My heart is breaking for her right now because she has this sweet little friend that she loves, that will not spend the night with her anymore because she is so terrified to sleep over with friends. I think its a bit unfair for the friend of hers to be this way. They have been friends since they were 4 years old and she has always understood Grace. Her friend has her fears like riding rides at six flags. We tried to explain to her that it is the same thing and not to take it personally, but she does.
Anyways, Grace will be my only homeschooler this year. Then I will have little Emma who is 4 and the 3 babies. It sounds like a lot, but its going to be very different for me!! All my big help will gone to. I'm glad though that the older kids will be getting to experience a new life of middle school.
As far as my year this year, I'm not sure what I'm going to be doing with the little ones, I want some sort of plan. This is why I wanted so badley to move to a farm house when we moved. I wanted to be able to tend to the animals and such. We lost sight of looking for that and fell in love with the bigger home with smaller land. I have a lot of dogs because I foster for a dog shelter, but not farm animals like I wanted. So, until we move into that dream farm land I will have to find a new hobby to do with the little Beasley's for the school year. Something that the kids will like as well.
Well, its late and the babies still have not fallen asleep yet so I need to see if they need a diaper change, so I will write again tomorrow. Thanks and goodnight! ( In the picture above is my oldest Faith that is starting public school for the first time again since 3rd grade!!)

Friday, August 13, 2010


Well, things are still the same with my daughter Haily. I have a therapy appointment set up for the both of us. I'm hoping that they can tell us why the same things happen over and over.
Today the issue seems to be my second daughter. She is my biological daughter. Gracelyyn has so much fear!! We tr
y to think back about how this started and we just can not seem to find anything to traumatic. The only thing that we can think of was when she was 4 years old. Gracelyyn was born with celiac disease so she was going to get an endoscopy at the hospital. When we got there they made me leave as she screamed out for me. I tried to comfort her as the doctors pushed me out the door. I watched through the door as they put the gas mask on her and she fought them. It broke my heart and I will never allow that to happen again. Gracie talk about that a lot so we can only think about that as something bad that happened to her. Grace wants to sleep in our room all the time, and she never wants to go to her class at church, and she is still the only one that wants to be home schooled. Gracie is 10!!! Yes, 10!! She should not have this much fear for a 10 year old. We make her go to bed in her room, but she always comes in at about midnight. I'm not sure what to do, do I not let her come in?? Do I make her stay in her room scared?? Does this make her fear worse?
Gracelyyn has a little friend that is h
er best friend. She is the sweetest little girl that loves Grace. Her friend has spent the night so many times here, but Now she wants Grace to spend the night there. Well, My husband is on his way to pick Grace up right now because she is crying that she is scared. Tony my husband is very mad about it. I know it is frustrating , but I don't think he should be mad. I just feel bad for Gracies friend. She really does not get why she will not spend the night.
The school thing is my next concern. I started homeschooling because Grace got sick with the celiac, and throwing up all the time. Now that all the kids have decided to go back to school we want her to. She has been so upset about it that she started throwing up again. So now we told her we would homeschooling her again because if she starts throwing up again at school they just send her home and she fails school because she misses so much. It makes us crazy. We want her to go to school because we feel like we are giving her to many options. We feel like if we send her maybe she will just be OK in the end. We d
id that her kinder year, but that was the year she started making herself throw up and they started sending her home. She learned how to make her own self throw up in kinder . That's so sad to me, and scary. I'm terrified she would start to do that again. I'm not sure what to do about all this fear. It goes against what God wants us to teach our children, and what we keep telling her. God wants us to trust him and to not be afraid. She just has so much fear!!
I'm thinking that when we go to the therapist next week we will see one fo
r Gracie as well. I just need might need one to by the time this week is over!! Just kidding!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Time for School

Sooo, We went school shopping on Tuesday of this week. It was miserable. We tried to take all the kids with us, which we do not do to ofter anymore. I thought it would fast enough so it would be o.k. Boy was I wrong!! Nessie decided to throw one of her big fits in the store so that everyone looked at me as I walked bu trying to figure out what in the world was wrong with her. I just kept on walking until I reached the door, then I made a mad dash to the car and just sat and waiting for my hubby and the kids. I just can not take her anywhere anymore. I can not stand this because I am not the type of person to just sit around. I like to get out and do things with the kids, but right now I just cant. I'm really hoping this is just a stage in her life that she will outgrow.
I know I'm bouncing around from one subject to another, so sorry if I loose you in this blog, but I have a lot to talk about, really a lot of questions that I am desperately seeking answers to. About 6 months ago one of my middle adoptive children began to act out. Her name is Haily and she is 7 . In the last post she is the first girl in the pink shirt. Anyways, everyone tells me she acts out because she was adopted, but I just do not agree. She had a lot of love from her grandma that she lived with before us, and she was only 12 months old when she came to us.
6 months ago she began doing things like cutting her hair off, stealing things from people and ALWAYS lying!! She continued these things, but now it has gotten out of control. I feel like the kid is going to give me a heart attack. I get so angry when she lies to me, because it is at least 5,6, 7 times a day. Then she will steal things from people all the time. She does all of this while she is in time out all ready. I am going to get a counselor, but until then, I am crying out for help. I can not even talk to anyone about her without crying. I do not feel like I have that bond with her that I have with the other kids. I know I should, but with her doing these things all the time, It is so hard to love on her and treat her like a princess. I know what I am saying is awful for a mom to say, but I do not like it either. I look at her and get so upset that she has me as a mom. I wish she had a better mom that could deal with her better and that did not blow up all the time. I thought I was a very patient person until I dealt with her. I guess I am a patient person, it just wears a person down. I will tell her not to do something and she will do it within 10 minutes. Yesterday she cut her off again. She was in so much trouble I set her to my room in the corner. While she sat there she got up and stole a coke in the corner. When we asked her she lied with coke still in her mouth. Then I get mad that she really thinks we are so stupid!! I ask myself because My husband asks me all the time, Would I feel this way if my biological kids acted like this. I hope and pray to God that I would. I do not think it is because she is adopted that I get so mad, its because she is so defiant, and so disrespectful to me and to Tony. The kids at home will not even play with her because they know she will steal their toys or break them. I know I'm not the only one hurting here, I know she is to. That's why I cry so much about this. I want her to be happy, and not feel like she has to lie about everything, but how???
That is what I'm dealing with this week. We are trying to get the kids ready for school and struggling with money right now as well. We usually home school and all the kids decided that they wanted to go to public school at the last minute, so we were not prepared to buy all this school stuff and clothes. There is just a lot of stress right now. I now things will get better, its all in Gods time.
If anyone has any advise on my little Haily, please feel free to email me or comment below. Thanks so much

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Today I tried to let the kids have a fun day with the kids. Summer is almost over and since I brought the new babies home I do not get to get out and do as much as I would like to with the older ones. So Tony came home early and we went to fiesta Texas. They had a lot fun. Now I can relax about letting them have fun before school. This will be the first year some of the kids go to public school, so we are really trying to get them ready for that to, mentally and emotionally.
I'm not sure what I am going to do with myself with only 4 kids at home with me. I'm the type of person that always has to be running around. I can not ever sit and relax, until bed time. That's why I forget to blog a lot, I just don't ever find the time.
The babies have started a new habit. They have all learned to pull their diapers off when they wake up in the morning, so now every morning we awake to naked babies, and wet beds. Even with pants on, they find a way. I think its funny they all started it at the same time though.
Its late, about 12.00 right now so I'm going to bed. I hope it was a good day for everyone. Praying for a good day tomorrow, we have a ton of doctors appointments!!

Friday, August 6, 2010

ELI IN THE SUGAR BOWLI don't have a lot to say today because I have had a lot of pain in my hand today. This is an issue I have been dealing with for a few months now, but the doctors have not figured out why yet. When the pain flares up it really bothers me to type.
I thought I would just post pictures instead. The picture on the bottom is Eli . He figured out where the sugar container was. This is his third time dumping it out. He had also figured that he loves the taste so he eats it as fast as he dumps it out. It was really cute, but we had to move it from him.
The picture at the top is Nessie, and his big brother Dylan. Dylan has so much love for his baby brother and sisters. He takes such good care of them all the time. Dylan was adopted 5 years ago from San Antonio.
The middle picture was one of the first days that Nessie started to walk. She finally favors walking over crawling. She is not walking all the time yet, but getting close. Now we just need to get Eli walking!!
I hope Ill get to write more tomorrow, sorry to be o boring, but its late here, almost 1.00 a.m. Have a great weekend

Thursday, August 5, 2010

The day to day

Yesterday I think I messed my entire day up. I thought it was today. I went to all my appointments for today making myself look really silly. Now today I have to get them all ready again and go back to all the appointments again. I am not an very organized person at all. Me and Tony have been trying forever to help get me to be better organized, but no luck yet. You would think with 10kids I would be!
Today I have a lot of extra kids with me because all my kids have friends that sleep over. It gets really loud at this house when we do this, but they all have so much fun. All the kids play together very well.
I'm trying to find some type of group here in San Antonio where they have other moms with kids with downs. I only know of one friend, and we do not see them that often. I want to know what other kids are doing at their ages, and what my kids should be doing right now. I never knew anything about downs before we adopted these babies, so I am still in the learning stage. I know there are so many times that I expect that they can do the same things as my other kids, and I have to stop and think, no they cant. If anyone knows of any type of groups, please tell me what info you may have. Ill leave you with a few pictures of the kids.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The start of the week

Well, Its Tuesday and I'm already counting down the days until the weekend. This is such a busy week here. Today I wen to the doctor for my hand. I have had been having pain in my fingers and my wrist for over 6 months now. The doctor thinks that I have a disc in my neck. I did not understand how that would affect my fingers, but he explained how it works.I get it now, but I do not like the treatment plan. I guess I am just wanting the quick fix as my husband says.
Tomorrow I have to go get an MRI, then I have to go register the kids for school tomorrow because we have decided to not home school all of them this year. I have to do all of this with all 10 kids. These are the time that are hard for me. These are also the time that people think I am crazy. I do not mind taking my kids to my appointments, but I do mind the people that stare very rude and move away when we come in. I truly believe my kids are very well behaved and very quite. The babies are not so calm, but they are babies. The just sit in there strollers and babble. I guess we just have to do what we just have to do.
Tonight the chief guy came back to our home. This time he made us Shepard's pie, and Strawberry Shortcake. It was very very good. He charges us 50.00 a meal for the entire family. We think we will hire him permanently , but only on the weekend and once during the week. We decided we would just take the money out of our allowance for eating out. It has just gotten to hard to eat out with all the babies screaming right now. This makes it easy to stay at home, but also not have to cook or worry about what I am going to cook. I try to watch what he does so I can learn because I love to cook if I can.
The kids are getting ready for bed now so I'm going to snuggle in bed and watch my T.V. since this is the only time I think I sit down during the entire day. I love my life and my kids, But I love night time to when I can just be me by myself for a little while. See you tomorrow.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Sunday at the Beasley home

Today we skipped out on church. We do not usually do this, but my 15 passenger van is in the shop. We are renting a suburban right now. I am in love with this SUV. I am now convinced that I want to get a new suburban for when I do not have all the kids in the car with me. When school starts i will no longer be homeschooling all the kids so I will only have 4 with me.
I will only be homeschooling one child my middle daughter Gracie. She was born with Celiac disease. This made her throw up all the time. She would get so embarrassed at school that they would call me all the time to pick her up, so that's why I started homeschooling to begin with. So,now she has asked again to still be home schooled because she still has so much fear. This will be my first year that I have not home schooled at least half of my kids. I am not even going to know what to do with all my time.
Today I will be giving up 2 of my foster puppies that I have had since they were 2 days old. I had bottle fed them for so long. I am so upset about letting them go, and nobody understands me. I have yet to meet someone that loves dogs as much as I do. It kills me to let them go. I know thought that they are going to a great home that I picked for them, so I have to just keep telling myself that this is best. The kids do not even care so much, only Emma , my 4 year old.
Next week the 2 Leeska and Nessie have their eye surgeries. This will help them to see better and help their eyes to not cross. I'm hoping that this will help their balance as well so that they can walk better.
We are trying to start the process to become a foster home soon. There is a lot we have to get ready for because after you have more than 6 kids in your home you have to be a group home. In order to do this you have to do alot more to be licenced. We have to almost make our home like a business. We have to put sprinkler systems inside our home and things like that. We also have to have 2 adults at home at all times, so we are going to hire a nanny to help out. I want to foster babies, not so much adopt them, but just foster. I'm hoping that this will be a rewarding experience for all of us. Please pray this will go smoothly for us. Thanks, Leah

Friday, July 30, 2010

My new blog

As I sat down to this blog today my daughter asked my ,"Why do you want another blog mom," I guess in my own words it is simply because I wanted a blog of my own, just for me. The first blog was for our adoption, and the second mine and Tony's together. I liked sharing things with him, but it was time for me to have my very own blog. I want to write everyday about what life is like having 10 kids and the silly things they do, and how we are just as normal as every other family.
I think a lot of people think that our life is so different because we have so many more children, but it really is not. Our kids play very well with each other so there is not a lot of noise in the home. Our children also help out a lot in the house so there is not always a consent mess.
In January we brought 3 babies home from The Ukraine. These babies have been very special to us. If you have been reading the blog before you will see that we have had a hard time with the smallest baby Nessi. She cries all the time and we have yet to figure out why. I guess that was one of my main reasons to blog was just to get away at night, to sit alone by myself and think about the day and all that had gone on. What I should have done differently or what I should have done instead. I'm excited about this blog because I feel I can truly express myself and how I feel and not just talk from me and Tony's point of view.
Today is Friday. I will end this first post telling you about today. Today I took one of my middle girls to the dentist. She has a cavity in almost every other tooth. Talk about feeling like a horrible mom!!! They said it was because I had given her to much soda, again I felt very stupid!! We will go every Friday now until all her teeth are filled. Then tonight I have a chief coming to my house. I hired him to come and teach me how to make several casseroles so that I can learn how to cook better at home. I struggle to make big enough meals for everyone. I'm excited to see what he makes and to see if it will be hard to do again. I'm hoping it will be simple enough that I can remember the next time, after all that is the point. So, I'm going to end now so that I can get the house ready for our guest tonight. Thanks for reading, Leah