Sooo, We went school shopping on Tuesday of this week. It was miserable. We tried to take all the kids with us, which we do not do to ofter anymore. I thought it would fast enough so it would be o.k. Boy was I wrong!! Nessie decided to throw one of her big fits in the store so that everyone looked at me as I walked bu trying to figure out what in the world was wrong with her. I just kept on walking until I reached the door, then I made a mad dash to the car and just sat and waiting for my hubby and the kids. I just can not take her anywhere anymore. I can not stand this because I am not the type of person to just sit around. I like to get out and do things with the kids, but right now I just cant. I'm really hoping this is just a stage in her life that she will outgrow.
I know I'm bouncing around from one subject to another, so sorry if I loose you in this blog, but I have a lot to talk about, really a lot of questions that I am desperately seeking answers to. About 6 months ago one of my middle adoptive children began to act out. Her name is Haily and she is 7 . In the last post she is the first girl in the pink shirt. Anyways, everyone tells me she acts out because she was adopted, but I just do not agree. She had a lot of love from her grandma that she lived with before us, and she was only 12 months old when she came to us.
6 months ago she began doing things like cutting her hair off, stealing things from people and ALWAYS lying!! She continued these things, but now it has gotten out of control. I feel like the kid is going to give me a heart attack. I get so angry when she lies to me, because it is at least 5,6, 7 times a day. Then she will steal things from people all the time. She does all of this while she is in time out all ready. I am going to get a counselor, but until then, I am crying out for help. I can not even talk to anyone about her without crying. I do not feel like I have that bond with her that I have with the other kids. I know I should, but with her doing these things all the time, It is so hard to love on her and treat her like a princess. I know what I am saying is awful for a mom to say, but I do not like it either. I look at her and get so upset that she has me as a mom. I wish she had a better mom that could deal with her better and that did not blow up all the time. I thought I was a very patient person until I dealt with her. I guess I am a patient person, it just wears a person down. I will tell her not to do something and she will do it within 10 minutes. Yesterday she cut her off again. She was in so much trouble I set her to my room in the corner. While she sat there she got up and stole a coke in the corner. When we asked her she lied with coke still in her mouth. Then I get mad that she really thinks we are so stupid!! I ask myself because My husband asks me all the time, Would I feel this way if my biological kids acted like this. I hope and pray to God that I would. I do not think it is because she is adopted that I get so mad, its because she is so defiant, and so disrespectful to me and to Tony. The kids at home will not even play with her because they know she will steal their toys or break them. I know I'm not the only one hurting here, I know she is to. That's why I cry so much about this. I want her to be happy, and not feel like she has to lie about everything, but how???
That is what I'm dealing with this week. We are trying to get the kids ready for school and struggling with money right now as well. We usually home school and all the kids decided that they wanted to go to public school at the last minute, so we were not prepared to buy all this school stuff and clothes. There is just a lot of stress right now. I now things will get better, its all in Gods time.
If anyone has any advise on my little Haily, please feel free to email me or comment below. Thanks so much tbarch@prodigy.net
My daughter has recently been going through hard times being very defiant and difficult. One day she finally yelled at me that I never play with her. I really stopped and asked myself when the last time I sat down and played with her one on one was. I couldn't remember =(. Sometimes it's so easy for us to get caught up in our business we miss something. Maybe she is doing all this just to get attention. Bad attention is better than no attention. I'm not saying you don't give her attention, but I know with so many little ones it has to get hard to give her one one one. Maybe try taking a couple of hours and taking just her and you and doing something special, treat her like the princess. See if you see a difference in her when it's just the two of you. Praying for everything to get better and for Nessie to stop crying =)
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